[Whoops, maybe she's going overboard with the whole "scare the newbie" thing.] Whoa, whoa, calm down. I didn't kidnap you, your parents didn't kidnap you, the rabbits outside didn't kidnap you. Here's where we get weird again: this place sucked you up 'cause it likes to eat people. It's pretty gross, haha. But it's cool 'cause it's got free food and wifi. Any food you want, too.