[ Leslie's been in Wonderland for three very crazy days, and she finally knows what she wants to say, and how she would like to introduce herself. She has a binder, a coffee with 42 sugars (give or take), and her device is set up to record. She smiles, hands clasped in front of her. ]
My fellow Wonderlandians,
My name is Leslie Knope and I'm from the amazing town of Pawnee, Indiana. In my life, I've been many places as I try to make my city and my state - nay, my country - great. And now I'm here, and at first, I thought I died in my sleep after my husband Ben forced me to eat cauliflower for dinner. Side note: cheese does not cover the taste of decaying foot in your mouth. He's a liar and I'm never trusting him again about anything ever.
[ Yes she will. ]
Now that I know we're all here together and various people have shouted at me about how I might die via anything from my evil mirror clone to, apparently, the building itself trying to kill me, I have one suggestion. When new people come to my town, we give them a basket filled with Sweetums cookies and candy, coupons for JJ's Diner, a map of the town with a list of everything to do in Pawnee, and a legal disclaimer warning people not to feed the raccoons. We're finally getting that one under control. That sounds nice, right? Welcoming? You know what happened ten seconds after arriving here?
[ Her pleasant smile drops and suddenly she's putting on a one-woman act. ]
Mirrors are EVIL! Things try to murder us every other day! THERE'S NO ESCAPE and you're stuck here foreeeeeeever plus you'll probably die or watch the people you care about die multiple times while you're stuck. But the closets are nice, you get free things! Welcome to Wonderland!
[ She lets out a breath, sitting back. ]
You see how that might come across as the worst way to welcome someone ever? Let's work on that, Wonderland. Feel free to reach out with any ideas on how to make coming to a world that should be impossible a little less traumatic.
[ She goes to end the feed, then pauses, still stretched out to press the 'stop' button. ]
Oh, and if anyone has seen a guy named Ben with a really cute butt, first of all stop looking, and second, please tell him his wife is here. Okay thanks, bye!
Leslie Knope | Parks and Rec
[ Leslie's been in Wonderland for three very crazy days, and she finally knows what she wants to say, and how she would like to introduce herself. She has a binder, a coffee with 42 sugars (give or take), and her device is set up to record. She smiles, hands clasped in front of her. ]
My fellow Wonderlandians,
My name is Leslie Knope and I'm from the amazing town of Pawnee, Indiana. In my life, I've been many places as I try to make my city and my state - nay, my country - great. And now I'm here, and at first, I thought I died in my sleep after my husband Ben forced me to eat cauliflower for dinner. Side note: cheese does not cover the taste of decaying foot in your mouth. He's a liar and I'm never trusting him again about anything ever.
[ Yes she will. ]
Now that I know we're all here together and various people have shouted at me about how I might die via anything from my evil mirror clone to, apparently, the building itself trying to kill me, I have one suggestion. When new people come to my town, we give them a basket filled with Sweetums cookies and candy, coupons for JJ's Diner, a map of the town with a list of everything to do in Pawnee, and a legal disclaimer warning people not to feed the raccoons. We're finally getting that one under control. That sounds nice, right? Welcoming? You know what happened ten seconds after arriving here?
[ Her pleasant smile drops and suddenly she's putting on a one-woman act. ]
Mirrors are EVIL! Things try to murder us every other day! THERE'S NO ESCAPE and you're stuck here foreeeeeeever plus you'll probably die or watch the people you care about die multiple times while you're stuck. But the closets are nice, you get free things! Welcome to Wonderland!
[ She lets out a breath, sitting back. ]
You see how that might come across as the worst way to welcome someone ever? Let's work on that, Wonderland. Feel free to reach out with any ideas on how to make coming to a world that should be impossible a little less traumatic.
[ She goes to end the feed, then pauses, still stretched out to press the 'stop' button. ]
Oh, and if anyone has seen a guy named Ben with a really cute butt, first of all stop looking, and second, please tell him his wife is here. Okay thanks, bye!
[ And then her video ends. ]